2.27.08
During a riveting game of “Clue” last night, eight year old Lewey decided to have a little Q & A with his unsuspecting momma.
Luisito: Mom, do people have sex for real?
A little caught of guard, I replied: Yes, people do have sex for real.
Luisito: Oh, I just thought it was on TV.
Moving the conversation along, I accused Professor Plum of the heinous crime of murder in the living room with a candlestick. However that didn’t work….
Luisito: Have you ever had sex, mom?
Digging the candlestick into the palm of my hand, I replied, “Oh….um…well, yes, Lewey, I have”
Happy with the response, he moved Mr. Green into the conservatory and then:
Luisito: Did you like it?
Now wishing I was the victim of any of the Clue characters with any of their weapons in any room, I said, “Lewey – why are you asking me?”
Luisito: Because I was thinking I should have sex too.
Realizing at that moment that the secret passageways on the Clue board didn’t really work and I was trapped in my own living room with no rope, wrench or revolver, I had no choice but to face this latest bomb-dropping, parenthood experience. So I asked him why he thought he should have sex.
Luisito: I don’t know, just something in my head tells me I should.
I explained that only adults have sex and went into how confusing it will be as a teenager and others will pressure him but sex is a special moment between two people who love each other (thank GOD he didn’t delve any deeper into that part of it with questions for me). He said he knew all that however…
Luisito: But why do people have sex?
Oh Lord Jesus is this my punishment? Can I just wear a hair shirt and get it over with?
Mom: Well you know that’s how babies are made, right Lewey? People have sex to make babies.
Luisito: OH MY GOODNESS!! That means i’ll get two good things out of it?
Mom: What do you mean?
Luisito: I will get to have sex and have a baby!!!!
Bones and Heart 